Friday, December 16, 2011

In which I go on a small self indulgent rant

This is not on the topic of fitness or food and thus does not belong here, but I have nowhere else to put it, so here goes.

I got an e-mail from a friend this morning lamenting the fact that I was not on Gchat so she could regale me with tales of the poor life choices of this girl she knows.  She knew it had been my work Christmas party yesterday, and said something about 'I hope you're still sleeping off epic work party shenanigans.'  I had been still sleeping off something, but that something was deciding a wise dinner was a peppermint mocha-tini and an entire sleeve of Oreos.  Go ahead, judge me, it's cool.

Anyway, the e-mail kind of bothered me on multiple levels.  One, I'm kind of over knowing people just so I can judge them.  Like, if you find this person so vile, stop being friends with them.  If you need to watch someone else's failure so you can feel like a success, maybe that's something you need to work on.  Goodness knows I have suffered from this in the past, but I know it and am working on it.

Also (and this is going to contradict exactly what I just wrote), she was talking about how excited she was for her fiance's work Christmas party, and I realized that in my head, the idea of an 'epic work party' is kind of an oxymoron.  The word epic is getting wildly overused.  There is nothing epic about drinking too much in front of your coworkers and dancing inappropriately or making out with someone or whatever.  But for some people, this is their idea of amazing.  I've recently realized, it isn't mine.

I want an epic life.  For the past way too many years, I've been trying to build the kind of life that a lot of people have, and that I guess a lot of people want - a comfortable life, with nice food and good wine and decent friends and a man who isn't bad to me.  But I want more than that.  I want adventure, I want excitement, I want a life I love, not a life that's good enough.  I want to make a difference in the world, not just in my life.

I also want everyone at work to stop stealing the cookies I've been trying to sell to raise money for Team in Training.  Sigh.

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